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zestfiveThursday was a later night than usual.
K is a girl from work whom I always thought was gay. A straight girl usually doesn't spike her hair like that. She had used male pronouns when I talked about my sweetie and I finally corrected her. She then confessed that her "roommate" recently ended their romantic relationship because of her (the roommate's) increasing interest in attending church. The roommate now thinks their 2 year relationship is not okay which causes K to question herself. She is ending her employment here at the end of March and going back home to work on the farm and was expecting her GF to go with her. So she's having a quarter-life crisis as she realized the job she though she wanted (that her degree is in) is not what she wants, she's lost her gf and she's questioning if it's okay to be gay. We talked at work quite a bit and I stayed an hour longer too. She obviously needed it and admitted being depressed. I was happy to talk with her and also didn't want to tell her she should be one way or the other, she's got to find her own answers, but I did want to show her that there's so much more out in the world that she probably didn't get to see yet. I showed her a website about a very progressive catholic church (that's how she was raised) explained Unitarian Universalism and explained about the social group that I started, also about belief.net that allows you to answer questions to identify the religion you believe in. I also shared some music with her, the Waifs ROCK ! I gave her my email knowing that soon she will be gone and in a much more rural area. She sent me an email on Sunday thanking me for talking with her on Thursday and how she's feeling a little better. I think it's so tough to grow up gay in a rural area, feeling like you're the only one. I wouldn't go back to that age for a million dollars. My life has only gotten better especially since P came into it.
Friday was pretty quiet, I was okay with that.
Saturday P was suppose to work but she ended up calling in because she didn't feel good. Lazy day in bed and we needed that. We did eventually get up to go purchase a new washer, I needed one because my old one rattles so much. I swear there's not a single load that doesn't get out of balance and makes the buzzer go off. With the fact that my Dad gave me $$ towards one and I've got a little more cushion in my savings, I broke down and decided to make a long term investment in a front loader washer. I've got a friend who repairs appliances and she says in the long run, I'll save on energy, water, soap and wear and tear on the clothes. As the washer will spin a whole lot more water out of them before they go in the dryer, they won't need to be dried for so long. P was happy as she admitted later she wanted to try one of those. She gave me a little $$ toward it too but she might not realize that I'm putting that $$ into the vacation fund.
That's the other thing we did, we opened up a savings account for vacations. This sorta (no I mean really kinda) freaks me out. It's something I want to do with her but I've never done this with anyone before except the ex husband. The fears that I have aren't really directly about P but fears of past stuff. Although, it was amazing because just after we left, she got her horoscope via text message on her phone and as we're both born under the same sign, it's mine as well....the horoscope was something about love and money in a positive way. Freak me out! In past relationships or more specifically one with N, she often spoke of future stuff but in the end it was a very brief (3 months) relationship (she recently married a man) and obviously nothing came of the plans for the future. I didn't expect it to though and we were fundementally different, but I've learned no to trust future plans I make with someone. I've always been such a good planner and it's easy to do it because I only think about how my plans affect me and my boy. To have plans with someone else, to want to build a future with someone else, to want to focus your energies toward another person is scary to me.
Saturday night after the purchase of the washer, we went to a friend's house for a card party. P ended up with a migraine which she took her meds for but I knew that she wouldn't be feeling too well. This was a gathering that included a couple who also connected at camp (where P and I met). I've never felt comfortable around them. E seemed pretty judgemental to me and K seemed a little stuck up. Now, I realize that I might be a little sensitive or paranoid so I always give people the benefit of the doubt. E asked about my son (she had met him once before about 3 months or so ago) I was pleased that she remembered him but because I'm the type that is honest and share probably more than people want to know, I spoke about the recent trouble with grades and my concerns. She started talking about how I should consider medicating him. I realize that my son likely does have some attention issues (as do I) but I don't think it's severe enough to warrent that especially since A has been pretty adamant about not wanting to go talk to anyone about my concerns. He just needs to accept some direction and develop some coping skills. I just really felt it wasn't her place to diagnose him through third hand conversation with only meeting him so briefly. I figured, whatever ! (of course paranoid insecure me worries that I should consider it)
We left after a few hours and home to sleep before getting up for a nice brunch with my local group. P calls them the country girls versus the city girls(see Saturday night event). She likes them better, I understand that too. It used to be that I couldn't wait to move into the city so I could connect with my friends more but I've got them in the country now too. The brunch was yummy, biscuits and gravy, fresh fruit, crossants with ham, cheese and muffins. They also had stuff for mimosas, bloody marys and coffee, as I don't drink, I had just the OJ and coffee. P had to leave for work, I stayed on after most of the other folks left and convinced J, P(different one), T to go for a walk with me. It was only a mile but it was good.
P was home from work when I got back, she needed to sleep and I puttered around. Cleaned out the frig, made some dinner (spaghetti) and started the dishwasher. We're also moving her clothes up to the spare bedroom that was my office. This is great because she'll have room for her clothes and she can get dressed in the early morning and not worry about waking me up.
L word with friends, loving the great conversation in the car with P and home to bed before starting the week.
Spring break is next week, Monday will be when we get the new washer, P took the week off too. We will have 9 full days together. The plan is to make more room for her and clean the house so that we can invite the country girls over.
Next Saturday we've been invited to C and M's house to watch "Tipping the Velvet" and I'm hoping that P and I can go to church with her son, R. P's also talked about maybe doing a Harry Potter marathon with R, I think that would be fun!
Another funny story about the country girls includes C and M who decided to decorate S and L's front yard with 12 blow up monkeys. S and L put them in front of J's house at the brunch. I'm hoping that J will put them in front of C and M's house on Saturday night when we gather for the movie. This means that C and M will likely put them in front of my house when we invite them over sometimes after the house is clean.
I better actually do some work today, See Ya!
Editted part about horoscope....
K is a girl from work whom I always thought was gay. A straight girl usually doesn't spike her hair like that. She had used male pronouns when I talked about my sweetie and I finally corrected her. She then confessed that her "roommate" recently ended their romantic relationship because of her (the roommate's) increasing interest in attending church. The roommate now thinks their 2 year relationship is not okay which causes K to question herself. She is ending her employment here at the end of March and going back home to work on the farm and was expecting her GF to go with her. So she's having a quarter-life crisis as she realized the job she though she wanted (that her degree is in) is not what she wants, she's lost her gf and she's questioning if it's okay to be gay. We talked at work quite a bit and I stayed an hour longer too. She obviously needed it and admitted being depressed. I was happy to talk with her and also didn't want to tell her she should be one way or the other, she's got to find her own answers, but I did want to show her that there's so much more out in the world that she probably didn't get to see yet. I showed her a website about a very progressive catholic church (that's how she was raised) explained Unitarian Universalism and explained about the social group that I started, also about belief.net that allows you to answer questions to identify the religion you believe in. I also shared some music with her, the Waifs ROCK ! I gave her my email knowing that soon she will be gone and in a much more rural area. She sent me an email on Sunday thanking me for talking with her on Thursday and how she's feeling a little better. I think it's so tough to grow up gay in a rural area, feeling like you're the only one. I wouldn't go back to that age for a million dollars. My life has only gotten better especially since P came into it.
Friday was pretty quiet, I was okay with that.
Saturday P was suppose to work but she ended up calling in because she didn't feel good. Lazy day in bed and we needed that. We did eventually get up to go purchase a new washer, I needed one because my old one rattles so much. I swear there's not a single load that doesn't get out of balance and makes the buzzer go off. With the fact that my Dad gave me $$ towards one and I've got a little more cushion in my savings, I broke down and decided to make a long term investment in a front loader washer. I've got a friend who repairs appliances and she says in the long run, I'll save on energy, water, soap and wear and tear on the clothes. As the washer will spin a whole lot more water out of them before they go in the dryer, they won't need to be dried for so long. P was happy as she admitted later she wanted to try one of those. She gave me a little $$ toward it too but she might not realize that I'm putting that $$ into the vacation fund.
That's the other thing we did, we opened up a savings account for vacations. This sorta (no I mean really kinda) freaks me out. It's something I want to do with her but I've never done this with anyone before except the ex husband. The fears that I have aren't really directly about P but fears of past stuff. Although, it was amazing because just after we left, she got her horoscope via text message on her phone and as we're both born under the same sign, it's mine as well....the horoscope was something about love and money in a positive way. Freak me out! In past relationships or more specifically one with N, she often spoke of future stuff but in the end it was a very brief (3 months) relationship (she recently married a man) and obviously nothing came of the plans for the future. I didn't expect it to though and we were fundementally different, but I've learned no to trust future plans I make with someone. I've always been such a good planner and it's easy to do it because I only think about how my plans affect me and my boy. To have plans with someone else, to want to build a future with someone else, to want to focus your energies toward another person is scary to me.
Saturday night after the purchase of the washer, we went to a friend's house for a card party. P ended up with a migraine which she took her meds for but I knew that she wouldn't be feeling too well. This was a gathering that included a couple who also connected at camp (where P and I met). I've never felt comfortable around them. E seemed pretty judgemental to me and K seemed a little stuck up. Now, I realize that I might be a little sensitive or paranoid so I always give people the benefit of the doubt. E asked about my son (she had met him once before about 3 months or so ago) I was pleased that she remembered him but because I'm the type that is honest and share probably more than people want to know, I spoke about the recent trouble with grades and my concerns. She started talking about how I should consider medicating him. I realize that my son likely does have some attention issues (as do I) but I don't think it's severe enough to warrent that especially since A has been pretty adamant about not wanting to go talk to anyone about my concerns. He just needs to accept some direction and develop some coping skills. I just really felt it wasn't her place to diagnose him through third hand conversation with only meeting him so briefly. I figured, whatever ! (of course paranoid insecure me worries that I should consider it)
We left after a few hours and home to sleep before getting up for a nice brunch with my local group. P calls them the country girls versus the city girls(see Saturday night event). She likes them better, I understand that too. It used to be that I couldn't wait to move into the city so I could connect with my friends more but I've got them in the country now too. The brunch was yummy, biscuits and gravy, fresh fruit, crossants with ham, cheese and muffins. They also had stuff for mimosas, bloody marys and coffee, as I don't drink, I had just the OJ and coffee. P had to leave for work, I stayed on after most of the other folks left and convinced J, P(different one), T to go for a walk with me. It was only a mile but it was good.
P was home from work when I got back, she needed to sleep and I puttered around. Cleaned out the frig, made some dinner (spaghetti) and started the dishwasher. We're also moving her clothes up to the spare bedroom that was my office. This is great because she'll have room for her clothes and she can get dressed in the early morning and not worry about waking me up.
L word with friends, loving the great conversation in the car with P and home to bed before starting the week.
Spring break is next week, Monday will be when we get the new washer, P took the week off too. We will have 9 full days together. The plan is to make more room for her and clean the house so that we can invite the country girls over.
Next Saturday we've been invited to C and M's house to watch "Tipping the Velvet" and I'm hoping that P and I can go to church with her son, R. P's also talked about maybe doing a Harry Potter marathon with R, I think that would be fun!
Another funny story about the country girls includes C and M who decided to decorate S and L's front yard with 12 blow up monkeys. S and L put them in front of J's house at the brunch. I'm hoping that J will put them in front of C and M's house on Saturday night when we gather for the movie. This means that C and M will likely put them in front of my house when we invite them over sometimes after the house is clean.
I better actually do some work today, See Ya!
Editted part about horoscope....
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no subject
Date: 2006-02-27 06:09 pm (UTC)I had a front loader in my last house. A kenmore, i abused it so much and so often. solid as a rock it was!
Being gay in the coutry is hard! on the other hand the groups are usually closer knit.... but if everyone else has partners and you dont...
no subject
Date: 2006-02-27 07:56 pm (UTC)We picked up a whirlpool one. I'm going to have to read all the directions because I've never used one. I'm sure I'll be washing everything I can once it's delivered.
There are a number of couples but the group I organized I intend it to be inclusive and not exclusive, people come and go but there is both single and couples. There's also both women and men but most of the time the women are the only ones that show up.
no subject
Date: 2006-02-27 06:10 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2006-02-27 07:58 pm (UTC)