My weekend

Oct. 8th, 2007 12:04 pm
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P came home early on Friday morning. It made it very hard to go to work. I think I'm finally coming back to my regular life slowly but surely. P says I've been gone, I say I've been grieving. Obviously, it's all new to us on how we grieve together. I know I definately do go inward when I'm not taking care of other people. I don't even know what I need really....  I'm a talking she's not so much. I know that she's been trying to be there for me, helping me out in ways. I need to watch for them to recognize it since she doesn't say anything. Sometimes in my grief, I'm oblivious or don't recognize her efforts, I think it's important to recognize people's efforts. Last weekend, she stocked my freezer. 

This weekend she wasn't feeling well on Friday when I came home from work. I let her sleep, she needed it. The boy and I cooked dinner, hoping she'd wake up but okay if she didn't. The boy talks about how he doesn't know how to cook despite having taken years of home ec. I finally said that we could cook together, I figure it would be good for us to have some time together. We made baked pork chops with stuffing, mashed potatoes and corn on the cob. I think it gave him some confidence in cooking. Hopefully we'll keep it up. The boy went to sleep and P woke up just as I was going to go to bed early. We ended up running to the store that must not be named walmart. It's what's open 24 hours a day in my area. She needed her coke. She ended up spending quite a bit of money, including an automatic catbox and two collars for the cats (Jinx already took his off and it's missing). She bought the cat box to try and make my life easier. She stayed up and I went to bed after the store. She wants to clean up the basement so that we can do crafts with our friends. I think it would be fun but cleaning the basement is just not one of my priorities. 

When I woke up on Saturday, after a slow start we first picked up a new lawnmower (the old one is finally dying) went to Bob and Scooters,  I mean, Dave and Busters.  She wanted to do this in support of finding things to do with the boy that he would enjoy. We ended up staying there a couple of hours and had a good time. The boy said it was better than Space Aliens  Food was pretty good. We ran into friends on the way out. At home, P wasn't feeling well and laid down. We were going to go to games night with friends but with P not feeling well, I was okay staying home. 

Sunday the plan was to go to church (early service because going to the late one runs the risk for P to run into T which makes her uncomfortable). I love going to church with her. We stopped to look at a camper (16 ft scamp) for sale before I dropped her off and I went to coffee. While driving to church we talked about our friend B who has a drinking problem. I think it's time for us to sit her down and tell her how much we're concerned about her.

After I got home, P was ready for a nap, I snuggled her down. very nice! The boy and I made fake frappicinos, dinner and then laundry. P left for work but we had a very good weekend. Good conversation with the boy, he's interested in going to same high school as [personal profile] anterastilis, I'll have to ask her about it.
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Friday night P came over, she was craving a hot beef commercial. She wanted what we had last Friday night. We went to the little cafe and ordered including pie and ice cream, blueberry for her and cherry for me.

On the way back home, around 9pm we almost hit a deer. I'm accustom to driving at night in rural stretches but most deer should have already been bedded down for the night. Poor P, she screamed and I just laughed (I tend to laugh when I'm nervous/scared). It took me a few minutes to get the shakes from my adrenlin rush, but they came. It was really close and it seemed to stop in the road (deer in the headlights thing) as I was putting on my breaks, seemed just a few feet before it dashed off the road.

Saturday I had to work, P came with me and we had lunch/dinner with her son. Bravo Burritos, my favorite with leftovers for lunch today! Yippee!!

Nice cuddling on Saturday night before getting up early for the meditative service before the regularly scheduled one. I didn't expect we'd make it to this because it was at 9am (which means leaving the house by 8am which means getting up at 7am or earlier - this is not so easy for us). Enjoyed both services and my friend J took me up on the offer for church. I'm glad she came. We (P and I) had originally sat with empty seats on either side but when J showed up, they were full so we moved to accomodate us all.

Stopped by R's house to see the new paint before she left for Tacoma. Funny, Howlsthunder should be there too...weird to think of two people I *sorta* know in the same town because they wouldn't know each other from anyone else...and I suppose not really knowing Howlsthunder in RL would be weird if we ever saw eachother in rl.

After R left, P and I went back home. The boy had wanted to go bowling or rollerskating but he never got around to making it happen. I was both disappointed and glad. Glad because I was tired and disappointed because it would have been good for him to get out of the house. He usually ends up not doing anything, P often thinks it's because he would be embarassed to be seen in public with us. I ended up falling asleep which wasn't good because I always screw up my sleep schedule and I did due to that among other things.

This morning I'm working on few hours of sleep. UGH


Sep. 21st, 2006 05:26 pm
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The boy found his camera. Turns out a friend of his decided to play a joke on him but forgot that she took the camera. We had a good time yesterday, going to the library, target and then picked up something for dinner at KFC. 

I can't believe this week is almost done. I had to do some instruction today on which is a way cool tool. Only 2 people showed up and they were both faculty members. 

Tonight is the season premier of ER which I might watch.

P's sick, she was going to come over tonight but couldn't make it. She said she'd come over tomorrow no matter what, despite the fact I told her that I could come to her on Saturday if she was too sick. 

This is our last childfree weekend that was the 3 in a row, now back to every other weekend even if it's really only Saturday noon until Sunday afternoon. How lame is that? His father only takes him essentially for aprox 30 days a YEAR !!! (I had to add a few days in there for holidays)  So the plan is.....

Friday night  - watch "Life as a house"
Saturday - pick up pants at tailor, P buy new work pants, go to B's for bonfire, stay at the city house
Sunday - church, go to M & C's for "the game" but not sure how late will stay

Finally have my "warning citation" signed by local law enforcement in an envelope so I can mail it off.  I'm hoping that the rain will have stopped by the time I walk to my car.

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Last week was more vacation. We also went camping in southwestern MN. The boy made arrangements to sleepover at a friend's house because he was all vacationed out. Camping was ok because my little sister got annoying. Mom was her usual over controlling with a smile self...didn't get enough time with Anj but I was okay with how it went.

Back to school, car transmission is having problems and waiting for repairs...expensive I'm sure. I've been borrowing my mom's 2nd car but the muffler went out yesterday. My WONDERFUL mechanic has given me a loaner for now.

The boy had his HIGH SCHOOL (!!!) open house last night. He will be attending the arts magnent school program within the high school. He's very excited and that makes me happy. I don't think I was ever that excited about school.

Work is back in session, I'm hoping to make myself indispensible and hoping for more contracts. Spoke to someone who was a fixed term professor for 20+ YEARS!!!

We're going to go see "Body Worlds" this weekend but otherwise hopefully lay low.

And now...I'm going to go crash, I am one sleepy girl!

catch up

Aug. 9th, 2006 11:09 am
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I'm posting this to get caught up.....
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Today I'm wearing new clothes. It's still going to be too hot. I'm sleepy and as soon as I can, I'm going home to sleep. I've got to wake up around 2am to leave town by 3am to take my sis and son to the airport. They're going to California, my sis wants to learn to surf. After that, I'm driving to P's to wake her up and spend a little time with her before I leave to go back to work (which will likely be a 2 hour drive!)
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It was a pretty good weekend, we were going to try to go to the rodeo but the weather didn't cooperate. I think it still went on but we didn't want to sit on the bleachers in the rain. P got a migraine so she didn't come out until Saturday. She also really slept in once the migraine went away so I think it was Saturday afternoon when she got here. The boy had left with his father so we were alone, GRIN.

Speaking of the boy's father, I paid the entire dental bill for the boy and was submitting a copy of the bill to the boy's father. He was really upset because the bill showed an "estimate" of insurance coverage. He wanted a bill that shows the actual amount, because gawd forbid I actually be reimbursed for more that the amount! He owed me a whole $60.70 !!!  He even made me sign something that showed that I wouldn't handle it that way in the future. What I'm suppose to do is have the bill sent to him and pay him for my half. I'm not sure why he's got his undies in a bundle over this but whatever. He might be doing this so he show how much out of pocket expenses he has as a means of lowering child support. I don't know, it's weird.

Sunday we slept in late, it was probably good for P. We met up with my sis and the Dad and P(his partner) for a Dad's day picnic. I know how much he enjoys spending time with his daughters and seeing us interact together. Sis planned most of the picnic ('cause she's a little anal retentive like that) and I just brought some veggie's and dip and strawberries. I also had a couple of other things for him such as a CD of organ music which he likes and coconut almond dates (another thing he likes). P brought her frisbee and we all played after lunch and then took a walk. It was very pleasant and nice to be outside despite the strong wind. Dad told P that he was glad she came and I think that thrilled her. It made me pretty happy too. The lake we walked by is viewed as a fishing lake by most of the locals because it's usually pretty green  and this time it was no different. (there's another lake about 3 miles away that is spring fed that people swim at).  While we were at the fishing dock, there was a woman who rode up on her bike, locked it up by the dock where the sign says "No Swimming Allowed" and jumped it, we were all pretty grossed out by it because where she parked her bike were seriously 4 BIG dead fish all bloated or mostly bones left. Ick....

P and I were able to get to bed mostly early. I rode in with her to work so that I could take R to his appointment. He seems to have made it out okay. I enjoyed the time with him and I know that P would do the same for me if I needed it. I'm going to pick her up from work in about a hour. We're going to stop at Trader Joe's and then head home, I'm thinking an early bedtime will be good.


Jun. 2nd, 2006 11:02 am
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Today I had planned to go to the Jeffers Petroglyphs  and the  darn boy had agreed to go with me but after hearing that the ride was going to 3+ hours one way, he changed his mind. I'm disappointed. He also didn't want to go to DQ to celebrate his last day of school. Then I suppose I should understand that he's 14 and doesn't really want to go places with his mother. P was going to go with me but she's still taking care of her son, I think that's important. When I whined to her about the boy, I decided to go alone but she said she'd go on Saturday. I hope that works out.

Yesterday I spent the day doing like 10 loads of laundry. I really have to go through all of my clothes and get rid of what I don't wear anymore, I'm running out of clothes hangers. I considered buying more hangers but realized that if I only empty some of them that I don't wear, I won't need to.

I should really go and do something productive, but I don't want to. I could clean out my closets, fold the last load of laundry in the dryer, match socks, take a walk or start the book I'm going to be reviewing. I could also go out to coffee, run into the city for thrift shopping and aldi shopping, but I don't want to. What do I want to do?

I think the above list is just so I can complain and hopefully motivate myself.

I just figured out how to download and import my transactions directly into my microsoft money accounts, but then for whatever reason a couple of desposits disappeared. I was able to finally locate them and put them back but I was a little concerned that I wouldn't be able to cover the mortgage.

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I have't been posting pretty much since I finished work a little more than a week ago. P and I got sick, although she is worse than I am.  Despite the fact that she's on antibiotics for her infection from her surgery. Yes, folks, she has had complications from the surgery that won't go away, from April 10th. Now they think she might be going back to work on June 5th. I think she's ready to go back but also a little anxious because she's been gone for so long. She's got to get her sleep schedual back on track and she'll likely go back mid week and for partial days instead of full days. 

I feel like I haven't done anything since I quit working but I know I have been doing things. I got the boy's bike to the repair shop, we'll probably be picking it up today. I got the oil changed on the car and they informed me that despite my inquiry about bent rims, the poorly sealed new tire that kept going flat did require replacement. Now that I hunted down the rim at a junk yard and had it replaced, I hope I've saved the tire. I finally got my desktop computer set up downstairs, balanced the microsoft money accounts after almost 3 months. I'm going to need to keep track of everything since I'm going to have two months off. I thought about doing some temp work to bring in some income but really want to focus on my house and me.  I haven't done the walking that I hoped I would and the last few days have been horriblely hot. I'll keep trying.

The boy has 3 days left of school. I'm sure he's excited about that. He ended up not being able to go to the class adventure (local theme park) because he didn't have his homework done. This is because he has no self control over the computer. I've been a little preoccupied with a few things and haven't been able to control him myself. The computer did have a lock on it but he's figured out how to get into the computer without the key so I just took the power cord. He is also way behind in the cleaning that I've asked him to do so the computer is limited to one hour a day until he's caught up.

I have had some fun, playing paintball, going to the driving range with P (never done that before) and another BBQ with friends (although we did leave early since we're sick).

So, I'm going to try to start walking but it's going to be either very early or late to avoid the heat. I'm going to try and get the laundry caught up. I'm not even sure what's clean and what isn't. 

Today's agenda includes picking up the boy's bike, the boy returning from his Dad's, possible grilled dinner at my mother's house, laundry. P's likely leaving tomorrow for a day or two as she has another Dr. appointment.


May. 15th, 2006 10:51 am
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Was a GREAT day! P and I woke up, resolved a few things that were hanging on our head. I worked on cleaning the bathroom some (it needed it bad, and more to clean too). P made a nice lunch. We left for coffee with the girls. This was nice, there were a couple of young girls there (by young, I mean age 3) She had recently learned how to wink and was winking at everyone. Adorable they were both shy but at the end of the time, were walking around holding hands. too cute.

Coming home, my boy was home from his Dad's and sleeping. It's so often the case when he comes back from his Dad's and crashes for 2-3 hours. His Dad claims to make sure that he's going to bed at a reasonable hour but perhaps it's the transition. I figure it's not my place to really say anything and let him sleep. Funny thing was, both P and I ended up napping too. I woke up and started dinner and when it was done, woke up the rest of the house. A brought out my mother's day gift. I didn't expect him to do anything but was pleasantly surprised. He had a card, rainbow chocolate mints, Coleman campfire sandwich maker and a comedy CD. This comedy CD was really something I think he wanted. I liked that he bought something he liked so he could share it with me.  I thanked A and it almost seemed that he was tearing up. I know that he's a sensitive boy and I love him for it. Afterwards,  P started making popcorn balls and A played the CD. I didn't really like it, it was sexist, racist, homophobic, antisemetic, classist stuff that was full of language that I'd rather not listen to around my son. I only made a couple of comments. We all helped form the popcorn balls once they were ready to make. This was fun, I think we all enjoyed it.

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This is my weekend

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Myspace Layouts, Myspace Codes, Myspace Graphics

He turned 14! Only 4 more years and he'll (in theory) be on his own!
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So the boy had a band "concert" last night (it actually was him playing one song). My father showed up with his partner as well as my sister, mother and the boy's father. P and I also attended the brief but really nice song he played in. Afterwards as we gathered around waiting for something to move on to, I was talking with my sister and mother about P and I's plans for vacation that included the boy. The destination was selected because the boy wants to go there (Colorado River and Grand Canyon). Well my judgemental sister says something like A being a third wheel to P and I. As I respond to that and try and let them know that A is really going to be the driver for the vacation my mother starts to count 1, 2, 3 (insinuating that if there are only three people, someone's got to be a third wheel). This pissed me off because they have no clue what's going on with us but they can be all judgemental about it. I ended up sending them both an email basically saying I don't like your comments and I really didn't appreciate you saying that in front of A because now they have introduced the idea to him.

Also my mother who has only spent 2 days(one last week to take him for a unneeded haircut and one weekend when A's father didn't want to take him because he was sick) with him since Christmas time is talking about him researching things he wants to do for his birthday, as if I don't do anything for him for his birthday, as if I never let him choose things to do. It really makes me feel like she thinks I'm incompetent. A is a really great young man and while I believe part of it is his own disposition but the other part has to do with his primary parent (yes that would be me!

Another thing, my stupid laptop won't access the network, argh!
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The Story Of The Shell.

This shell reminds me of my life; it has a cone shape starting from a single point. I believe that this shows the birth of my self. Its cone shape represents the many choices that can become of me, and my choices still increasing today. The sentiment in the cracks of the shell reminds me of the times with a lot of emotion in my life, both happy and sad. Those memories stay with me. Red color at the tip of the shell represents the present and maybe even the future ahead of me. Knowing that this shell tells the story of my life, the question reminds, what is next?

For better or worse, I believe my son is also a deep thinker. This is what he wrote for an English assignment. He'll be 14 years old in April.
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What a weekend.

Read more... )
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So the boy is off with his Dad until Sunday afternoon. He'll be back on Sunday and he'll start school back on Tuesday. He said that his favorite christmas gifts were 1) Dungeon and Dragons stuff his Dad gave hime 2) Bass guitar 3) book my sister gave him. He did get his room at the tv/computer room cleaned up FINALLY. Now I just have to get the rest of the house clean. I'm going to focus on the living room, bedroom and basement (also known as the dumping grounds). Yesterday I fixed my mom's computer, did some laundry and started cleaning my bedroom. It's going to take some time. Today I'm working but Friday I don't work and will also be cleaning. I've still got the christmas letters to address and mail out.

P's got to work on Friday at both her jobs, we still haven't decided what we're going to do for New Years. Her friend has invited us up to her cabin complete with snowmobiles but we haven't decided yet. We might just want to stay in and have a quiet new years complete with plans for the new year.

When the boy's father came and picked him up, we talked a little. He said that he thought P had a good heart. I think she does. It's very scary for me to feel all of these feelings for her. I've never been much of a worry wart, but I fear that something might happen to her. I know it's irrational. I'm just afraid that we won't have enough time together. Perhaps it's because I was watching "Sunset Story"

Last night, I met up with P after work. I got to spend the night at her place. As the boy was gone and I had to work in town today anyways. Watched the news with her "brother".

On a lighter note, my favorite local musician has updated her website and it's wonderful! check it out!
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The boy had his school conferences today (and on Monday). He's mostly getting B's except for one c+ in band (lack of practice) and an incomplete in math. I'm okay with that because he will be making up his missed assignments. He will be going to school by 7am even though he normally doesn't get to school until about 7:30 or so. I think it should only take him a week or two to catch up but he's going to have to stay caught up. I told him he needs to maintain a B average so that when he's of age, he can get his drivers license. This because it's directly tied to lower car insurance.

I didn't get much sleep last night, and I'm surprised that I'm not more tired. Perhaps, I really did catch up on my sleep in Iowa. P came over and we got caught back up on each other. grin

This weekend will be a busy one, but a nice mix of working and fun stuff. Although, I know that I need to get on track with other things around the house...yeah, the yucky ones like cleaning.

Fun stuff is dancing to Roxxy Hall on Saturday, coffee on Sunday with my local area group and church. I hope I'm not too tired on Sunday but I really want to go. It will be a little weird to finally run into my ex turned friend. I'm not worried about my reaction, just hers and the uncomfortable silence that typically happens. I know she will be hurt and it will be even worse because right now I'm so happy and I know that will likely show. Should I hide my happiness because I know it will hurt her or just let her suffer through it? The feelings that I have for P, while quite new seem to be very different than I ever had with her.

Mother wrote an email today about Thanksgiving. She's planning to be in Iowa with my sis. We won't be staying at her house, but at a motel and eating out(at my sis's church). Problem for me is that A's Dad has Friday through Sunday (and I have Thanksgiving day). It's quite a pain to do all that driving for a single day (4 1/2 hrs one way). On the other hand, I call his Dad to find out what his plans are, he was playing victim when I talked to him, something about how he really doesn't have any family and etc. This is a role he often plays, I used to get SO sucked into it, now I'm just tired of it. He sets it up for himself, relationships (family and otherwise) must be nurtured. IMHO, he doesn't do that, he is so needy that he's not willing to give.

If my boy is going to be with his Dad on Friday through, I don't know that I really want to drive down to Iowa to be with my crazy mother and sister, even if I really like my Iowa sister. Is that bad of me?
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Surgery for my Dad and sis is in one week. I'm nervous about that, I'm taking the day off for it. I'll be helping take care of my sister as she recovers in Iowa. Of course, I've got to get over my cold otherwise it wouldn't be very good for either of them. Any suggestions for getting healthier other than vit c, cough drops, lots of fluid, sleep and echinacea. I've gone from stuffed up to coughing so I'm not sure if that's good or bad. Tonight should be cough syrup with codine for me and sleep. Although, I do have to get an absentee ballot for election night. I've also got to get some laundry done or A will be going to school in his underware!

Yesterday my son's 3-5th grade teacher came in. Apparently A had written her a letter for an assignment. I'm not sure exactly what he wrote to her but she said that it made her cry. She also said that he's "brilliant" and I said sure (along the lines of Garrison Kellior where all the kids are "above average") she insisted that she really thought that he was. Oh my...not sure to believe her, this coming from the woman who also thought he might have ADD.
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working this morning but didn't get a break, which I don't mind cause it's only 4 hours...Last night my boy went was picked up by his Dad and taken to dinner and a movie. I don't remember the last time his Dad took him more than his every other weekend. I also had a chance to tell him about gradeschool. Gradeschool still hasn't taken any test, he's on the road a lot and recently (I felt that he's withheld or downplayed this)he's revealed that he's married. Not so honest in my book... I just wish that we could get this issue resolved and closed.

My dearest friend in the world came to my house last night as she has such wonderful organizing skills(and I have such crappy ones) and helped get my kitchen in order. She was going to help me in my office but even I got overwhelmed there. We had a conversation last weekend about my wish to get back on track in my life but my inability to do it or ask for help from someone. She really enjoys and does well at that and offered to help. I've got to LOVE her for that.

Her GF was also helping out another friend who needed to drive a couple of hours to pick up a motorcycle she purchased off of ebay, cheap. They drove it down on the back of her truck before getting to my house. This meant that they had to find a hill (and I provided a sturdy board) to get the bike out of the back of the truck. Then she had problems with a dead battery...this took lots of patience and the help of a jump from formerly mentioned truck. I hope they made it home okay, I finally got to bed around 2am.


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