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This is the song that I associate with R, I heard it when I was in the drugstore getting new meds for P on the day after it happened. She needed something to knock her out because she couldn't deal with it. It's so weird that he's been gone for 2 months now.


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Today we went to see "The Curious Case of Benjamin Button" which was longer than I expected and because my son wanted to go....better than I anticipated. If you have three hours and are up for an epic type movie, go see it. I thought it was very good but it was also kinda sad for me, perhaps because I've been feeling sad lately.

P's still pretty sad and I'm letting her do whatever she needs to do...sleep, be angry or whatever. Also while we were here we went to the Indianapolis Museum of Art which was amazing because it was FREE. Parking was free, admission was free, coat check is free (but we didn't use it) and what I loved about it was the permanent collection not only included the information about the artist and the piece but they also talked about the style of the artist and what made them notable. The worst part was when we were walking in, we passed a group of people and I didn't see the rest of the people but the profile of the man looked just like my Dad. He was wearing a hat, full beard and glasses. It was something about the line of his beard and his neck. P noticed that he also had a camera and tripod(which would be so my Dad). He was definitely a younger version of my Dad but certainly just like I knew him. I could hardly speak as I tried to explain my reaction to P.

I also emailed with a girl who knew P's son. I've been monitoring his email in case anyone that knew him sent him emails that didn't know what happened. She was a girl who met him through craigslist last summer and they emailed and talked. She even came up to visit him from Iowa.  She spoke of having similar struggles with depression, anxiety and sexual orientation/gender and thoughts of suicide. She says that he touched her life and saved her from her attempt.

We'll be driving probably about 12 hours. I hope the weather will be good.
zestfive: (Default)
Teh boy started school today. I can't believe he's a junior in high school. When I got home from work today we ran to Target to pick up some school supplies and etc. He's okay with Target tennis shoes so I won't complain. I did end up buying him this brown leather zippered planner (which he will take out the planner part and insert his school planner). I think he just wants to have a zippered planner with little tablets for taking notes with). I enjoyed hearing about his classes.

This weekend was good, we camped out at our friend J's house along with 3 other couples and a handful of kids. P wasn't feeling so good after pushing herself too much the last couple of weeks at work so she slept in the last couple of mornings. We had good times with friends we haven't hung out with for a while. She did her watercolor painting and I assembled some peace signs that I'm going to send to family and etc to honor my Dad.

Monday we went to the state fair. I didn't think that we'd have lots of energy especially with as hot as it was. We volunteered with the Sesquincentenial booth for a few hours and then had some food (cheese curds, slice of pizza, ice cream, lemonade, corn dog) attended the Toby Keith concert. We had great seats, 5th row center. I just hated sitting next to the lady who sat too close to me (I tend to have big private space). We got some really fun pics. I'm not much of a Toby Keith fan but P chose to surprise me with a date night. I like it when she plans things for us.

240

On a sad note, her friend J (who lives in Iowa) lost her sister on Sunday. She had late stage brain cancer and lost the war. She was younger than P which makes me worry a little bit. J is also chronically sick with wegeners disease. P wanted to go down there but J didn't want her to do. I feel bad for P because she obviously cares deeply for J but she keeps everyone at arms length. I met J once when she came up here, she's a riot but I do get a sense of sadness about her.
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This breaks my heart.



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September 2015

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