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This weekend included re-arranging my bedroom. I've got some things to sort but I can't even believe it's done. I normally keep everything in the same place because I don't care too much about aesthetics and my surroundings. The vacuum really had a work out, I think I had to empty it more than 3 times. I've got the inspection report on the townhouse, a little more work than I thought but I think I can make it happen. After I close on it, I'm going to have an open house and make a list of things I'm asking for help on the townhouse. It will be hard for me to ask for that help but it will be a good step for me. I've got lots of people asking to help and I don't know how to choose, it's overwhelming for me. 

no parade due to weather which is ok, didn't meet R but that's ok too.

Dinner with my Dad's partner. Tomorrow is off so I'll have to see what kind of trouble I can get into. 4 days left of work before summer schedule. I really liked having Friday and Monday off as a slow slide into it.

I'll be helping my mom move way up north in about 10 days. She dropped some stuff off at my house that I will enjoy using at the townhouse. I need to start coming up with a list of things I'll need at the townhouse.

Cleaning!

Jul. 1st, 2009 01:24 am
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We've been cleaning for a couple of days. My garbage and recycling cans are overflowing and it feels good.

There is still plenty to go but we'll get there. My dream is to be able to park my truck and the camper in the garage.

We did decide we're not going camping with the girls and Saturday we'll be doing the St. Paul Gangster cave tour and Sunday we'll be doing the segway tour along the Mississippi river in Minneapolis. We've been productive and will have fun on our staycation.

My back has had a crick in it and my arm has been sore. I'm happy to say I've got a chiropractor appointment tomorrow.

Teh boy drove in the dark for the first time tonight. He's finally getting a little more relaxed with driving. He's gonna have some friends over to play D & D tomorrow. We ran to the store to buy snacks. It's a little more difficult as one of his buddies is vegan.

life is definitely feeling better for me, thanks for all your support and kind words.

Pride

Jun. 26th, 2009 01:10 pm
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I was kinda just expecting not to go to Pride this year. P is never much for it and it's usually too hot for her. In the years gone by P stays home and I've gone with R. This year that ain't gonna happen. Although when she asked about this weekend, I reminded her that it was pride, she did talk about going but not for hours and hours and that she didn't need to go to the parade. I'm glad she had that attitude. I thought we'd got on Saturday but it seems that Sunday is going to be cooler and no rain. We'll see how it goes...

Good day

Jun. 25th, 2009 02:24 pm
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Yesterday I got an email that included teh boy's ACT scores. I was expecting him to do pretty well because I know how smart he is even if he doesn't work to his potential. He wasn't feeling it very good about the test. His composite score was in the 80th percentile nationally which means he will likely be able to attend the community college where I work next year for his senior year of high school. I'm so happy for him.

To celebrate, P and I ran to the store for steaks (and lower fat chicken for me) sweet corn, potatoes and salad (with feta, blueberries and strawberries). P even suggested inviting teh boy's father over. This was such a good idea because of the tension between them, it provided an opportunity for them to get past it. P suggested both the celebration dinner and inviting the father, what a wonderful woman. I've been really loving on her lately.

His Dad was a little nervous about coming but he did come(his stupid pride and depression) and I was very happy. He wasn't too negative about his job loss, that he doesn't feel good or etc. Teh boy and his father got along very well. P had teh boy make his Dad's steak and then his Dad realized he wanted to be there to watch him cook it so he cam down and watched. I made the salad and boiled the corn.

After the great dinner, teh boys cleaned the table (and put the dishes in the sink where teh boy will load the dishwasher). We played wii bowling which teh boy's father had never done and it was fun. It was great for everyone. The depressed father had a good day and reconnected with his son, the son had a good time and was happy with his family, P has been feeling better and was motivated by her appreciation of her partner to cook/grill for her and I was happy that everyone was happy.
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P was put on thyroid medication today. She was sad that she has to take more medication but I'm hoping she will feel better after it kicks in.

I broke down and purchased a new camera today. I've lost my other camera. The last time I saw it was in March during our Seattle trip. I could have sworn I had it when I came back but don't really know where it went. It's possible I didn't bring it back but it could have also been taken from me at work, my car or something like that.

Yesterday we went to the zoo with my sisters, mom, Dad's partner and teh boy. I was glad teh boy got out of the house but he got cranky after we stayed until it closed (6pm). He's like "I knew this would happen" which I'm not sure what that meant.

Tomorrow me and teh boy are going to the dentist.
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Happy Mother's day (and I'll take Blot's lead and say to all those folks male and female who do mothering.)

I hope you have a great day. I had a delightful dinner cooked by teh boy. It was lovely. P was here and she enjoyed it too. Teh boy gave her a hug too. She's having a tough time today.
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This is the song that I associate with R, I heard it when I was in the drugstore getting new meds for P on the day after it happened. She needed something to knock her out because she couldn't deal with it. It's so weird that he's been gone for 2 months now.


Last week

Jan. 12th, 2009 11:26 am
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Last week I met up with [livejournal.com profile] mplsindygirl for dinner at The Vegetarian.    It was really very lovely. I know sometimes I don't always like to go out before or afterwork when the weather is as it is....it's the homebody in me, work and then go home. I had a really lovely time. The restaurant was great, not too busy but it should! The food was great and we shared our meals and desserts too! If you're in the area and like vegan/vegetarian food you should check it out!

This weekend P and I went to her cousin's house to attend a family birthday and Sunday was our couples group. That was pretty much it, P doesn't have the energy to do much of anything these days and I'm okay with that. Next weekend we have a work friend's birthday party and Sunday she's gonna get together with our friends to do craft day. She really needs to take some time off of work and catch up on her life. At our couples' group we talked about finance and etc. We had some good conversations about taking our relationship to the next level financially wise anyways. I do have some concern since I feel a little vunerable about that but changing a bene on my life insurance isn't too bad. Teh boy would still be listed there for 75% of my life insurance.

One of these weekends soon we're going to go to the Art Shanty project with my Dad's partner and likely my sister, hopefully my son. My Dad would have loved it. Anyone who is familiar with this have any tips for us? Do we have to dress like we'll be outdoors the entire time?

Today is the first day of classes for the new semester. My second semester here. The other librarian is sick today. I've take one sick day so far and he's taken like um...4-5. He believes that they are like vacation days since we don't get them. I think I'll wait until I'm no longer a probationary employee to be so liberal with that.

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 Yikes, I can't believe it. My new job starts today. I think with Pride and everything happening, the time just got away from me. My cousin and sister worked on the cabin this last week, they got the drywall done. We also got the deadbolts working on the doors. I think steps have been made. My Dad's partner was out there too, she spoke of how it was difficult because she knows it's better than he could have ever of imagined. :::weep:::  My sisters, my Dad's partner and I have to get together to figure out the next steps for finishing the cabin. My sister has started to take on that and I'm SO grateful. It's just very overwhelming for me with the cabin. I want to do it perfect but I have never built anything before. At least she's much more familiar with the building process having been an executive director for Habitat for Humanity for over 5 years. 

I was talking to my friend R, she's back from Pittsburgh for 2 weeks, I hope I get to see her. She was talking about how she wanted to do a healing deal. She read about digging a hole and yelling into the earth but she felt strange about putting her pain into the earth. I immediately said that the earth is a mother and has always absorbed the pain and suffering of her children it's part of the way she cares for us. I really don't know where that came from, just came right out of my mouth. She said it brought tears to her eyes and to be honest, it brought them to me too. I don't know where that came from!

Yesterday I picked up the home movies that we had transfered to DVD. I watch 2 hours of them last night. They are out of chronilogical order but it was good to see. Poor P, I put her through watching all of that too.


Awww...got to go to work, see ya!

 

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 Friday I took the boy (and my mother!) to the Chatterbox Pub for dinner and then off to the spoken word event at the Heart of the Beast theatre. My mother and I split a meal and the boy enjoyed the cranberry spritzer more than his sandwich (despite the fact he didn't want to take his leftovers home, I did but then HE ate them!). He went on and on about how he needs to be in the city. I don't disagree, he's outgrown where we live. He's ready to move on to bigger and better....so was I at that age. My mother talked on and on about various things, she really seems lonely. I think she spends enough time with my little sister and was ready for a fresh ear. The spoken word was really fun to go to, wide variety of audience members, really great performers. The accoustics weren't as good but perhaps because we were on chairs on the side of the stage. I also had to tune my ear to the speed and cadance of the various performers. Entrance fee was higher than originally indicated but I was okay with it, to support the event. 

Saturday morning, I slept in. I cleaned up the bedroom some, started the laundry and tried to get my outlook to work with my phone. I don't know what the problem is because it worked before. I gave up and eventually took a bath (cause the new bathroom is still in progress - one thing after another). Once I got out, I realized that it was time to meet the girls for dinner. The boy wanted to go, which is nice since he so rarely wants to come with me. Dinner was okay, nice to see everyone. The only problem was pretty much as soon as he was done, the boy wanted to go. Thankfully L and S came to the rescue and dropped him off at home. I had to run to the store and shortly afterwards, I was home. He was asleep and despite my sleeping in, I fell asleep for the night soon after.

Sunday I was up early, decided to go geocaching, found 3 of them before getting ready for brunch. My younger sister loves tradition and between her and my mother they planned this. It was intended to be 6 people but it turned out to be only 3. Them and me, out of obligation I went because I promised french toast. It's so hard to be the only one there because then the conversation and etc is focused on the three of us. They're use to talking to each other and so they want to focus on me. Since I had dinner with my mother on Friday, I felt she knew most of what was going on with me but she kept talking. UGH I knew that I couldn't just eat and run so I kept trying to figure out how much time would be reasonable before I could leave. Home, more laundry and to bed. 

quiet weekend, not ready for the week. want to stay home and watch movies or something.
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I had a good weekend. We made it to church despite the bonfire that went until 2am. We never did do the intervention we planned. She seemed better for some reason. Although in the cover of the darkness, we did switch her beers for O'Dooles, she never noticed but did go to bed early.

We even went to the early service at church. My Dad's partner was there, it was good to see her. One of the musicians was a young man who my son knew at one time, he's phenomenally talented and my Dad would have loved to hear him play.

I'm really tired today and can't wait until I make it home. I hope to sleep in tomorrow. I've got a headache right now and just took something. I'm listening to the last Harry Potter book on tape.

The weather is so dreary which kinda matches my mood and I don't want to be here.

I got the new lawnmower working. I also finally "fixed" the burnt-out headlight in the red car, turns out the bulb just fell out of the headlight. I just need to clean it out and change the oil for the boy to start practicing driving again. I also want to fix the "stuck" door.

Okay, I better go start working on the ST-200 work. The appointment with him is in 5 minutes.
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 What a week, between work, dad's estate stuff (stoopid attorneys), life and etc. I'm just exhausted.  I'm starting to have to write everything down and keep track of it in my palm (thanks to P! It really helps) I have some social things that I want to do in the month of October - including my 20 year high school reunion! 

Yesterday I had to drive 70 miles one way to go sign some paperwork so that I can be offically appointed executor in the eyes of the court and back again to work. Can you say PAIN in the BUTT? I did finally make an appointment with my Dad's financial planner to go over my share of his retirement, it's on 10/9. 

When I drove home, I stopped at my sisters to pick up the paperwork for the application for new service to install electricity to my Dad's cabin. We talked and I enjoyed it, had to get home to the boy. We talked and I enjoyed it and then I called my Dad's partner, I hadn't talked to her in a while. She's not doing well, I'm trying to not be intrusive but wanting to make sure she doesn't get lost inside. Her nephew is probably going to have to drop out of school for a year at least (hopefully no permanent damaged has been done). It's just so horrible.

I'm finally getting ready to go to bed, read a little bit finished "The Day My Dad Died: Women Share their Stories of Love, Loss and Grief" and I was just about to go to sleep when B called. She wasn't in a good spot. I really enjoy B despite the fact she adamantly denies she's an alcoholic. Her and J were fighting and J finally put her foot down. Everyone feels bad for J because we all know that we couldn't handle B as much as we love her. As I do love her, I want her to be safe so I asked her what she needed to be safe. She said she needed to go to her car and than to J's. She wasn't in any shape to drive in my opinion but I'm sure she's driven in worse shape. I told her I'd come pick her up and take her when she needed to go (even if she was locked out, she could crash at my house). We eventually got to J's house and I think she changed the locks, B knocked on the window and J woke up and they had a "discussion" because I promised to stay to make sure B was okay with staying there, I had to wait. No one likes to argue in front of anyone, we've all been there likely so I felt bad that I was listening there. Eventually B said that I could go, I wanted to make sure J knew that I loved her too. Hugged J (who is normally pretty good at keeping those bootstraps up, held me tight and cried hard on my shoulders). I let them know that I loved them both and hoped they could work through what they needed to. I think I was home by 1:15am, before I had to be up by 6am but I couldn't settle down until almost 2am. 

Perhaps, that's why I'm not very productive today.

I did give P the heads up and let her know that I won't be very good packing for our camping weekend when I get home from work. She was great about that.
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 Thank GOD it's Friday. P came home from work early this morning so we got some cuddling while she fell asleep and I tried to stay asleep until the alarm went off. It was so nice, I've been missing her.

Tonight, some of my friends will be coming over and then we'll go to a mexican restaurant. YUM Tomorrow morning the boy will be going with his father and P and I will have the whole day to ourselves. Sunday we're going to the fair and  Wait...I think I already posted this. Okay, next thought....

At the last family reunion which seems ages ago (it was really Aug 10-12) my dad spoke of a book that he recently read called "The Short Bus" which he had read and had gone to hear the author speak. It was about learning disabilities. My Dad has some pretty severe learning disabilities (was also left handed). They thought he was retarded when he was a kid, this affected his life a great deal. I knew that much but I didn't know how much it affected his life. He spoke of having nightmares monthly ever since he was a kid, I'm guessing that's somewhere around 60 years. Recently at a chiropractor (I think) appointment, he met with someone who was some kind of shaman from south africa (I think) who offered to do some healing kinds of things, the shaman said that he had all the tools he needed to finaly deal with this demon and they were in baskets all around him. He later had a dream where all of the problems he had always dreamed about were resolved. After that (granted it was only 6-8 weeks prior to his death) he never had a nightmare. Now, I'm a skeptical person but I also understand that I don't know everything in the world and if this worked for my Dad, then it did regardless of the how and why.  I'm so thankful that he had this brief moment of peace before his death. I'm currently reading the book, The Short Bus and while the only learning disability I feel I have is poor spelling(which I attribute to spellcheck!) and the ability to immediately identify my left and rights. I do have coping skills for determining my left and right, it just take a second longer than most.

I want to talk to my Dad's partner to hear more of this story and his experiences. I also understood that when he had his learning disabilities finally diagnosed, some things showed up obviously very deficient but other things he was a genius. I want to know what he was a genius at.

Driving home with my mother, I did get her to talk about how my parents first met and their life in the begining. That was very fun to hear. My mother has lots of issues about being an only child and being accepted. She did  also admit that she was a bit of a princess in her family because her parents couldn't have any more children. My Dad seemed to be in love with another woman growing up but my mom just kept hanging around and finally he started indirectly attaching himself to her. He also really wanted children. I wonder if he was really interested in her or more interested in getting married so he could start a family.

I also want to hear more stories from his best friend. I promised to email him more to continue to tell the stories about my mother. I'll send him a quick email to see if he's still interested.

Enough of this...I've got to get back to work.
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I was trying to focus to post about my weekend but I've been watching the news online about the shootings in VA Tech. My thoughts are with them during the horrid time.

Friday was pretty laid back, P was sick with the flu so we didn't do anything. I had hoped to go see catiecurtis.com and rachaelkilgour.com but it didn't happen. I was okay with that. I brought home some dinner for P and the boy. Played some video games and went to bed.

Saturday morning it took forever to get up and moving but we did have breakfast at the local diner, P was up and in the mood for IHOP but that would require hours of driving. I was up for it but she still wasn't completely feeling better. After nice breakfast, we went to the local home and garden show. I was hoping that the company I've considered using to install new furnance might be there (they were) and to see what else I might consider for my house. I did stop and get some information from a pest control guy about box elder bugs! See the pic from my front step!




Afterwards, we took a snooze, talked a lot of the phone to friends who were having trouble, had ice cream and pizza before we went dancing. That's what I LOVE about P, she might not be that excited about doing something (although, in this case, I think she was) or she might not be feeling that great (She wasn't) but her attitude is usually always very positive. I LOVE that about her. We picked up a friend of mine who had never been to this place (she loved it) and danced a few dances (it had been a while - can you say out of shape?).

I also got the lovely opportunity to speak with my local law enforcement on the drive home. Thankfully, I don't drink so I wasn't DWI-ing but apparently I was going 43 in a 30. She let me off with a warning, thanks very much officer!

Sunday we again, were not up for church but for some stupid reason woke up shortly after that. If he had really wanted to make it, we could have....but we didn't. Brunch at noon and we really were going to be closer to being on time...but were late. Great food, great friends and a new little puppy.

We swung by the Home and garden show, picked up some smoked bacon and beef jerky and some rug cleaner (P's a marketer's dream). Once we were home, P needed to sleep since she's on those graveyard hours. I went to check my email/blog and etc. She doesn't like it when I do that on the weekends so I usually save it for when she's busy. She couldn't sleep so we ended up running to the grocery store. She later got a 2 hour nap, I made dinner spaghetti and she left for work as I went to sleep.

Teh boy is driving me crazy, I've decided that we're going to go make an appointment to deal with his attitude. My EAP will pay 1-3 appointments in full and hopefully we'll have things straightened out by then. The person that handles these, happens to be a friend and neighbor of mine. I think that might be a conflict of interest, we'll see how that goes.

my girl

Jan. 8th, 2007 08:29 pm
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She's in the hospital now with pneumonia. I'm getting her cpap machine parts cleaned before I bring them to her along with her other meds. I'm glad she knew enough that she needed to go back to the Dr. I sure hope she heals quickly. I'm still sick but no where as bad as she is. The boy is getting sick now too. He's also been a real pain in the butt.
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Friday was pretty low key, ended up finishing a book (Girl-Bomb) laying next to P as she rested from the week.

Saturday amazingly we were up and out the door by 10:30? the schedule we like this:

1) bank - withdrawl
2) bank - deposit
3) library - return and re-check out
4) library - tour and pick up gifts for #5
5) church - drop off gifts for "share the spirit"
6) groceries - good savings

I find this funny because of the duplicates. Yes, I had to go to two different banks and two different libraries.

Once home, cleaned the bathroom (including washing the floors which REALLY needed it) and started on the kitchen floors which also really need it. P cleaned the garage so I could park in that stall (the other one's panels must have moisture in them because they freeze and it's hard to open). We then had a bonfire in the driveway, invited friend J over and roasted hotdogs. Such FUN, who would have thought we could do that during the 2nd week of December in Minnesota!

Sunday we skipped church (my fault, I set the alarm wrong - couldn't get ready in 15 minutes) We did go to Menards (to get my christmas present from my love), Rx's and then to our retreat reunion** and skipped the play that we considered attending. We did stop at my mom's house she decided to purchase a minivan and wanted to ask my opinion but really, she was excited and wanted to show it off. Hurry to bed, do some reading and off to sleep. We didn't get enough sleep but whatever...

Today previously mentioned gift got delivered (yeah, no more dishes by hand! GRIN). I had hoped it would come sooner than it did so I could get my hair cut or get the oil changed in my cars. Guess it will be another day.

***regarding the retreat reunion this was a "marriage encounter" type retreat that was open to all committed couples (I liked it because it was not exclusive but inclusive to heterosexual couples, homosexual couples, married couples, couples that didn't live together and etc). Anyways, the lead couples that were there attended something similar in the 1990's and have been leading retreats like this since then. They also participate in a couples group which meets once a month to continue the work on their relationship. It's just really amazing to hear the stories of other committed couples and all they go through. We're planning to do this and I'm looking forward to it. What a great thing for a couple to do for themselves, to find an environment that is supportive of your relationship, helping you explore your relationship and growth within it. P who is normally rather shy in group settings talked more than once, I was shocked!

P and I have been through some tough times and this weekend I realized some of my issues. Hopefully the identification of them will help us continue to work through the tough stuff and help us to maintain our healthy relationship.

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